Yesterday, my friend, Darlene, sent me Wendy's latest post. I knew that George had spent last summer in Houston for medical treatment at the same time I was going through mine. I didn't know for sure but assumed it was for cancer. It seems my mind most often goes in that direction now days.
For the first time, Wendy posted about the experience and her words were so poignant and so accurately descriptive, that I just feel compelled to reprint here.
Summer 2013 also has its challenges. We paint a rosy picture on facebook and in photographs, but anyone who knows such health concerns understands that there's no quick or guaranteed fix. Remission, we learned, means living with cancer, even after successful treatment. It means ongoing tests, occasional setbacks, and unpredictable side effects.
Anyone who has dealt with this enemy can quickly identify with what she is writing about. Even a report of "Cancer Free" does not release a warrior from the battle. It is ongoing for the rest of their lives.
For the last few months I've been dealing with pain in my shoulders, mainly my left shoulder. I waited as long as I could to give it a chance to heal itself but finally gave in and am headed to an orthopod on Friday. Bone cancer? Yes, that thought crossed my mind. Since the pain is in both shoulders, I'm believing its just geriatric but there is still that kernel of doubt that lingers. The job is to not give that kernel life so that it grows and takes over my quality of life.
This past weekend I visited my cousin and his wife in the hill country. As we were sitting deep in conversation one day, I remember telling them that I love my life. It surprised me when those words came out. I used to say that all the time but I I haven't since April 23, 2012. Overcoming colon cancer and then the depression that nursing my best friend, my 14 year old Golden, Chipper, who was my nurse through chemo, and then having to have him put to sleep, brought about.....I thought I would never utter those words again. But I did. I was excited to realize that I once again am in love with my life. I am so grateful for my creativity and my life as an artist, a mother, a grandmother and, most importantly, a child of the Most High.
Thank You, Father. Thank You.